Friday, October 21, 2011

Man Flu: A Horror Story

            Ladies, does your man lie on the sofa and moan pathetically when he’s sick?  Do you dread hearing your sons sneeze or cough because they might be coming down with a cold? Do you immediately try to figure out what you can reschedule at work because you know you’re going to be stuck at home for three days bringing them juice, homemade chicken soup, and Tylenol?

            Women will refuse to go to the doctor until they’re dying (“I have pneumonia? I didn’t feel that bad when I was teaching today.”) Men are much more in touch with the suffering and agony they experience from common cold symptoms ( I…AM…SICK!)

            Dr. Mom really has no choice but to put up with the drama that male illness brings. She starts out sympathetic, but after some time she finds herself wanting to stop his suffering by placing a pillow over his face and pressing down hard. It’s difficult enough to deal with a sick man when you know that he’s really sick, but what do you do when he’s faking it?

            A survey of 2000 women in England indicates that 20% of them believe that there is actually an illness called “Man Flu.” Yes, one in five women believes that this illness, which strikes only during March Madness and Sunday afternoon football games, is a serious medical condition. The only thing a man can do when he has “Man Flu” is to lie on the couch and watch whatever sporting event happens to be on television.

            Now ladies, WAKE UP! You do not have to bring your man a cold beer and a bag of pretzels when he has the “Man Flu.” He is perfectly capable of getting them for himself during a commercial. That’s because he's not really sick!

So the next time you think he’s going to have “Man Flu” – and you can predict outbreaks of this flu by looking at the TV guide – try to get to the couch before him. Flop down, stretch out, and in a weak voice ask him to bring you a beer and some pretzels. Turning the tables on him is a time-honored female strategy that often gets us what we want. He might get the point, and, at the very least, you’ll get a cold brew and a comfortable spot in which to watch the game.

“Man Flu?” Give me a break!



  1. Vicki, this really made me giggle!!

    And so fitting as I came across this on Facebook a few days ago. It lets you send the pathetic men in your life a hilarious personalised video to stop them moaning of man flu!

    The video stars them, announces their name and is set to reworded lyrics of James Brown's hit "It's a Man's World".

    Funny! My boyfriend got bombarded!!


  2. Lisa
    I love this video! I bet my husband and sons will love it too. HaHa!