Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Presidential Candidates Series: Chicken Little

Who is the ideal candidate for President of the United States? Looking for some suggestions? I hope you enjoy my series of political ads much more than you're enjoying the Obama/Romney ads on TV right now. --Vicki

Hello. My name is Chicken Little and I'm running for President of the United States as the Environmental Party candidate. I believe that the number one issue facing this country today is the disastrous impact human beings have had on our planet. Consider man-made global warming, for example. The polar ice caps are melting, the oceans are getting bigger, and soon the entire earth will be covered in water. You have to admit, compared to this catastrophic scenario, all other issues become irrelevant.

I am the ideal candidate to solve this nation's main problem because I have personal experience dealing with environmental disasters. Single-handedly, I solved the terrifying problem of the sky falling. As you can see, the steps I took to correct the sky-falling catastrophe have been and continue to be successful.  I promise that I will implement the steps necessary to avert environmental melt-down from my first day as President, regardless of cost or other petty considerations.

A vote for me in November is a vote for planet Earth. I am Chicken Little, and I approved this message.

Paid for by environmentally-concerned American chickens and the committee to elect Chicken Little.